I am not going to miss pregnancy. There it is. When I say that my husband is not surprised in the slightest. He’s been there with me all the way, through the morning sickness that was endless, to dealing with a ridiculously clingy and equally heavy toddler. The heartburn, the hour and a half trips to appointments…the list goes on. My personality just doesn’t deal well with being pregnant.
A couple of days ago in my frustration, I posted something on my personal page of how I was done with sharing my body, that I was basically ‘over it’. There was a response from someone that told me they would do anything to be in my position, which of course, caused a guilt trip in me. I deleted the status. But honestly I didn’t feel guilty for long. In fact, I felt annoyed.
Because of course, I count myself lucky. Even when Tom is testing my patience to the extreme or I am exhausted beyond words. Even when my sleep was non-existent and I was rocking a baby hourly night after night. Even through all that. I have never felt anything but lucky. Lucky to feel what it’s like to love someone more than the Earth itself, lucky to have a family and a supportive husband. Lucky to be a mother.
It is no different in pregnancy. I won’t miss the hard parts. And I refuse to feel guilty about that. Does that mean I don’t appreciate that moment you see the pink line? Or when you hear that beautiful heart beat? Or feel those first kicks? I will appreciate those moments forever. Maybe I will even miss them. But pregnancy on a whole? Nope. I’m ready to have my new family on the outside and my body back.
There’s always someone worse off than you, but that doesn’t mean you don’t have the right to feel whatever it is you feel at the current time. And that doesn’t mean that you are ungrateful or unsympathetic towards their situation.
I am tired, emotional and sore. Some days are worse than others. But overall I feel happy and so lucky. Not long to go until the special feeling of meeting this being that was made and nourished in my body. There is nothing that can compare.
How was pregnancy for you? Love it or just want to get to the end result?